Date of publication: 2017-08-30 15:14
Ty Webb : Let me tell you a little story? I once knew a guy who could have been a great golfer, could have gone pro, all he needed was a little time and practice. Decided to go to college instead. Went for four years, did pretty well. At the end of his four years, his last semester he was kicked out. You know what for? He was night putting, just putting at night with the fifteen-year-old daughter of the Dean. You know who that guy was Danny?
Carl Spackler : Licensed to kill gophers by the government of the United Nations. A man, free to kill gophers at will. To kill, you must know your enemy, and in this case my enemy is a varmint. And a varmint will never quit - ever. They're like the Viet Cong - Varmint Cong. So you have to fall back on superior intelligence and superior firepower. And that's all she wrote.
The Dude : I dropped off the money exactly as per. look, man, I've got certain information, all right? Certain things have come to light. And, you know, has it ever occurred to you, that, instead of, uh, you know, running around, uh, uh, blaming me, you know, given the nature of all this new shit, you know, I-I-I-I. this could be a-a-a-a lot more, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, complex, I mean, it's not just, it might not be just such a simple. uh, you know?
Carl Spackler : I got to get into this dude's pelt and crawl around for a few days. Who's the gopher's ally. His friends. The harmless squirrel and the friendly rabbit.
Transamerica Financial Life Insurance Company is authorized to conduct business in New York. Transamerica Life Insurance Company is authorized to conduct business in all other states.
The Dude : This is a very complicated case, Maude. A lot of ins, a lot of outs. Fortunately, I'm adhering to a pretty strict drug regimen to keep my mind limber.
Tony the Chauffeur : So he says "My wife's a pain in the ass. She's always busting my friggin' agates, my daughter's married to a jadrool loser bastard, and I got a rash so bad on my ass, I can't even sit down. But you know me. I can't complain."
The Dude : This is a very complicated case, Maude. You know, a lotta ins, a lotta outs, a lotta what-have-yous. And, uh, a lotta strands to keep in my head, man. Lotta strands in old Duder's head.
Al Czervik : Hey, doll. Could you scare up another round for our table over here? And tell the cook this is low grade dog food. I've had better food at the ballgame, you know? This steak still has marks from where the jockey was hitting it.
Carl Spackler : This is a hybrid. This is a cross, ah, of Bluegrass, Kentucky Bluegrass, Featherbed Bent, and Northern California Sensemilia. The amazing stuff about this is, that you can play 86 holes on it in the afternoon, take it home and just get stoned to the bejeezus-belt that night on this stuff.
Danny Noonan : [ to Lacey, while they're laying in bed after having sex ] I want you to know that just because of this you don't have to stop seeing other people.